I walked into my local branch of a national video game retailer to pick up my pre-ordered copy of L.A Noire yesterday. The game features scenes of a dark and gritty nature, the check out featured something along the same lines. After looking in the back cupboard for my copy which, rather wonderfully, was waiting for me with my name on (regular listeners to the podcast will be aware of Geordie Al’s arguement when he pre-ordered Smackdown vs Raw 2011) the patter began.
“We’ve got a few specials on today regarding L.A Noire” spoke the assistant.
“Oh really?” I replied, thinking that I had budgeted for £35 and wasn’t really in the mood to go over it.
“Yes, you can get the game, a guidebook and a pre owned copy of Grand Theft Auto 4 for £56″
I’ve tried GTA4 in the past, it’s never grabbed me. I think I’ve just hit the age now when Rockstar’s earlier crime capers don’t agree with me. I passed on the offer thinking that would be the end of it.
“In which case you can buy the guide book for £9.99 rather than the usual £15′
I made the relevant humming noises and, at this stage, I was entertaining the idea of buying the guide just out of sympathy. I wasn’t quick enough.
“Some of the interrogation scenes can be pretty tricky, this guide can help you through it”
So essentially this assistant had suggested I pay £10 more to make my purchase easier because reading emotional responses might well cause me great difficulty. The barrier went up.
“Are you sure? Because the manager of this shop got the guide and he never usually does, he bought it for this game alone”.
I was quite sure and I thought I’d better ask the obvious question.
“Don’t you think” I ventured “that buying a guide for a game you have yet to play is a little bit much like giving up before you’ve started?”
He shrugged his shoulders. I politely declined his most generous offer. He accepted payment and placed the game into a bag. He wasn’t done yet though.
“Anything else you’d like to pre-order whilst you’re here?”
A fair stand alone question but one that has been tacked onto a list already. The next game I’m truly awaiting would be Deus Ex. I asked if he has a date for that which he then checked.
“August 26th but we don’t have a code for it yet”
I informed him that I’d wait until nearer the time. Then came the classic, his masterstroke, the one he’d been building up to.
“Do you want to pre-order Modern Warfare 3?”
No, I bloody do not want to pre-order MW3. Even if I did it’s six months away from release and it’s just been made painfully obvious that, as far as UK gaming retail goes, they’re putting every egg they ever had on that one Activision shaped basket. This is also a retail chain that recently began to advertise the fact you could buy pre-paid cards in store with the correct points amount to buy DLC or Arcade games. Downloadable games that can be purchased easily without the need for setting foot in their establishments. It’s no great shock that games retail is slowly dying on its arse especially when the experience of shopping in these places is usually soulless and sterile.
Not for the first time I reject his kind offer.
“Are you sure? Because we’ve got a code for Modern Warfare 3″
Yes I’m sure you have mate, I’m sure you have.
